


A Comforting Anxiety [Moxiety]

by Sammy_is_obsessed



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M, moxiety - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-19 20:56:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14881061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy_is_obsessed/pseuds/Sammy_is_obsessed
Summary: Patton was happy, had to be happy at all times in order to help his friends. There was always good in the world, in everything and everyone and he always saw that. Patton was one of the major reasons that Thomas was as cheerful and kind as he was and without him, he would be vastly different. Patton saw it as his solemn duty to make sure he always no matter what helped the others and made sure they were as happy as they could be ... even if this meant ignoring his own feelings. "Negative" wasn't a word in Patton's vocabulary, as he saw it it was unnecessary and he never had a reason to be a resident of "frowny town." He was much too busy with the other sides and Thomas to have the time to so much as think about anything other than quaint, happy thoughts. He had obligations, responsibilities that he needed to fulfill and if he didn't ... well gosh, he'd be letting everyone down, including himself. No, sorrow was never an option ... even if he sometimes secretly wished that it was.





	A Comforting Anxiety [Moxiety]

**Author's Note:**

> (A/N:) Here's some more Moxiety because I love these two so much. If you enjoy it please consider leaving me a comment, it is much appreciated. Thank you.

Third Person P.O.V:

Patton was Thomas's happiest trait, everyone knew that very well. He was morality after all, and if anyone took a moment to get to know him they would see that he was about the most adorable and heartwarming creature in the whole wide world. He was kind, funny, and always seemed to have some method of cheering you up, no matter the situation. He could brighten up even the worst of days with a good old-fashioned dad-joke or a cuddle or two. He was good at distracting the fellow sides from their troubles, whatever they may be, and getting them back on their feet when they were feeling their lowest. Even Roman, the brave and charming prince-like figure had his off-days where he wasn't feeling his usual confident-self when Patton stepped up to plate to make him know how much he was appreciated and loved. Logan also on rare occasion had his moments of self-doubt, even when he knew that it was ridiculously illogical but in these concerning moments Patton would rush to his side, reminding him of his self-worth and everyone's appreciation of him. With Virgil these reminders needed to be far more frequent - he was anxiety after all, so it wasn't exactly surprising that he was normally welled up with self-loathing and doubts of all creeds and colors. Even so, though he was the most challenging to cheer up and it could take some time, Patton was there for him and helped him whenever he needed it.

Patton was happy, had to be happy at all times in order to help his friends. There was always good in the world, in everything and everyone and he always saw that. Patton was one of the major reasons that Thomas was as cheerful and kind as he was and without him, he would be vastly different. Patton saw it as his solemn duty to make sure he always no matter what helped the others and made sure they were as happy as they could be ... even if this meant ignoring his own feelings. "Negative" wasn't a word in Patton's vocabulary, as he saw it it was unnecessary and he never had a reason to be a resident of "frowny town." He was much too busy with the other sides and Thomas to have the time to so much as think about anything other than quaint, happy thoughts. He had obligations, responsibilities that he needed to fulfill and if he didn't ... well gosh, he'd be letting everyone down, including himself. No, sorrow was never an option ... even if he sometimes secretly wished that it was.

=+=

Over the past few days Patton, despite his best efforts, hadn't been feeling like his usual chipper self. He couldn't pinpoint what had caused the mood change, but it was definitely drastic to him. For the first time in a long time, he was having a very difficult time seeing the good in situations. He was ... sad? He couldn't possibly understand why; there was no reason to be upset! There was nothing to stress about or to cause him distress. All of the other sides were doing well, Thomas included. He'd been sleeping well, for once, finally seeming to take some of Logan's advice on a healthy sleeping schedule, though that could be a bit constraining at times. He and his friends were recovering from being sick since they'd all recently gotten ill and there were videoes in the works. All in all, he had no room to be complaining. But then why was he feeling so bad? He just ... couldn't seem to find the good in anything. He couldn't remember a time he'd ever felt this unhappy and that frightened him greatly. The others couldn't see him like this. He just didn't know what he'd do with himself if they found him in such a pitiful state.

He locked himself away in his room for most of the day when things had been getting the absolute worst. He found a way to distract the others with tasks and saying that he felt like taking a nap to bide him some much needed time to himself. Roman and Logan were slightly concerned about Patton and how he was acting a little stranger than usual but as they saw it, this was Patton they were talking about. If something was really the matter, he would surely tell them about it. He was always there for them so, of course, they would be there for him if anything was the matter and they were positive he knew that fairly well. Virgil didn't look at things this way, though. Not nearly.

He'd noticed the shift in Patton straight away. That sparkle that was always present in his eyes now seemed to be muted. His smile, always so wide, now appeared forced if anything else. He could see how differently he was acting, had been acting for the last few days and he knew that if the other sides didn't understand that something was wrong and he, to the best of his anxious abilities, was determined to fix it. He loved Patton to death after all, and he couldn't stand to see him this way.

It seemed only fitting that he be the one to approach the matter. The other sides were not as in tune with unpleasant emotions as Virgil was. It felt like he could write a book filled with all the things he knew about those negative ways of thinking. And differing from the other two, his and Patton's relationship was ... complicated to say the least. He truly wasn't really sure what they were. Sometimes they would cuddle up just the two of them and have private bounding moments where Patton would press kisses to his face and giggle. But other times he was very affectionate with Roman and Logan, too. Who was he to say that what they had was special? He wanted to, though, truly he did. And though he loved Patton he'd never actually admitted it to him. What could he say? He was anxiety, and being the embodiment of such a thing would make anyone a little nervous to share their feelings. Regardless, though, he knew that it was his job to set things right and tackle the matter at hand.

It was late in the evening by now and Virgil and Roman had since gone to bed when Virgil found Patton sitting on the sofa in the common room, his eyes not fixed on anything particular and face twisted in discomfort. The television had been turned off some time ago and the room was dark and lonely. He sat stiffly, his fingers twiddling on the side of the couch. It was apparent he thought he was all by himself, as he started mumbling to himself under his breath, his ever-present smile now absent.

"You aren't going to cry, Patton. There's no reason to cry. Nothing's wrong. You're fine. Everything's fine. It's fine. I-it's fine." Through his repetitive words, Virgil could hear how on the verge of tears he was, something that broke his heart.

"Pat?" He entered the room slowly, cautiously as Patton's head snapped in his direction and eyes widened in the horror that he'd been caught. Quickly, he whipped up a fake smile, trying his best to keep up the charade though Virgil knew better.

"Oh, Virgil! H-hiya, kiddo. What're you doing up?" Virgil sighed deeply, sitting down next to the father-like trait and looking intently into his eyes, Patton shifting uncomfortably under Virgil's steady gaze, fidgeting. 

"Patton can ... can we talk?" Patton paused, trying to uphold his appearance of happiness that he felt he needed to maintain before nodding.

"Of course, Virge," he said, sniffing and trying his hardest to keep the onslaught of tears from spilling. He cleared his throat. "What d-did you want to talk about?" Virgil, anxious about approaching this as he was, outstretched a shaky hand, gripping his hand in Patton's and lacing their fingers together, his eyes never leaving Patton's.

"You, Pat. Let's talk about you. How're you doing?" Panic flickered in Patton's eyes, a look no one hardly ever saw on his face. He for once couldn't think of some form of a rebuttal or distraction. No pun or joke that could take away from how he was really, truly feeling. He, in this moment, felt like he was completely and utterly broken.

"Me? I-I'm fine!"He said, feeling himself cringe as a crack infiltrated his sentence. Maybe Virgil wouldn't notice? Oh god, of course, he'd notice. He could detect these things from a mile away. He looked away, trying to compose himself. To fix himself.

"Patton, look at me," he instructed softly, Patton's watery eyes met his once again as he sniffled, his grip on Virgil's hand getting just a little bit firmer, "If you're feeling bad, that's alright. We can't all feel 100% all the time, I should know," he said with a wry smile that disappeared as quickly as it had appeared, "But if you aren't feeling very well, then that's okay. Off days are something everyone is allowed to have, even you." And that was it. That was what broke Patton in two. His vision blurred behind his glasses as warm tears distorted it. He sniffled, removing the black framed specs and setting them down before his body was quickly overtaken by sobs. Virgil, anxious though he was, was quick to wrap his arms around Patton in a steady, calming and loving embrace. The hug wasn't nearly perfect, nothing compared to Patton's when he was feeling down, he thought to himself, but he was Patton's only option right now and he was damned if he wasn't going to help him. Patton collapsed in his arms, pulling Virgil ever closer and sobbing into his chest, cursing himself for breaking down this much.

"I-I-I'm sorry I-I can't-." Patton, try as he may, couldn't get an intelligible sentence out through his tears. He was trying, oh god was he trying, to explain that he didn't mean to have this outburst and that he was sorry for making such a fuss over himself but he couldn't even get the words out.

"Hey, shh. It's alright. Don't say you're sorry. I've got you," Virgil muttered softly, sweetly to Patton, running a steady hand through his hair and allowing him to have it's moment. "I'm not going anywhere. You're going to be okay, I promise." It took a great deal of time for Patton to calm down. Though Virgil didn't think so, he was doing an excellent job of helping him, murmuring kind and encouraging things to him and rubbing slow and calming circles into his back. When Patton had settled down he pushed himself away from Virgil, reaching for his glasses and adjusting them.

"Virge, kiddo, I'm so sorry you needed to see me like that," he said, his voice slightly regaining its usual pep but not nearly as much as it normally held. "I promise you, I won't ever subject you to that again. I was just being silly -."

"Lying is wrong," Virgil suddenly interjected sharply, catching Patton off-guard. He blinked, staring at the darker trait in confusion.

"... What?" He asked with a slow pause.

"Lying is wrong," Virgil repeated, slower, his words pointed, "You told me so yourself."

"Well, gosh, of course it's wrong, Virge. Always has been, always will be," Patton confirmed, still not getting it.

"Then don't lie to me, Patton." Patton looked slightly offended by this, placing a hand on his chest in a very Roman-like fashion.

"Virgil,I-I ... wouldn't lie to you."

"But you're lying right now," Virgil pointed out sadly. He didn't want to upset Patton, truly, he didn't, but he needed him to understand what was going on. He just wanted to help him.

"I don't ... I don't understand." Virgil sighed, reaching for Patton's hand again and grabbing it slowly.

"When you say that you're not going to have another breakdown, pretending you're never going to be sad again. That's a lie."

"Virgil I -."

"No. It is and you know it. Patton, I understand that you don't like to be upset. Neither does anyone. You're so incredibly helpful to all of us, to me. I'm so thankful to have you to help me when I need you. Patton ... I-I ..." Patton quirked an eyebrow, leaning forward. 

"You what, Virgil? Is everything alright?" Virgil swallowed thickly, taking a deep uneven breath.

"I love you." A breath caught in Patton's throat as he scanned over Virgil for any deception or a joke somewhere in there but found none. He was serious. He was actually serious.

"You ... you do?"

"Yes," Virgil answered in a slightly quivering voice, "And I always want us to be as honest with each other as possible. No matter what. If you're upset or sad, you can tell me, or Roman and Logan. We care and we need to know what's going on. Having off-days and being down in the dumps, well that's just human nature. It happens to the best of us. But we want to help you. I want to help you. You've gotta let me in just like I let you in. Do you understand?" Patton took a moment, taking a deep breath before nodding.

"I ... I think I do. I'm really sorry, Virgil. I never meant to be a burden." Virgil shook his head, outstretching his arms for a hug which Patton gratefully accepted without a moment of hesitance. 

"You aren't a burden and you never will be," he swore seriously. They stayed like that for a long moment, wrapped up in each other's arms before Patton spoke, breaking the Extended silence.

"Hey Virgil?" Virgil tilted his head, looking at Patton who's eyes were filled with sincerity.

"Yeah?" 

"Thank you. For everything." Virgil smiled, holding him just a little closer.

"Any time, Pat. Any time."'

"You know ... I do too," he said suddenly out of the blue, baffling Virgil.

"You what?" He asked and all of a sudden Patton had leaned forward and shut his eyes, pressing a quick but tender kiss to Virgil's lips. The anxious trait stiffed slightly before melting into Patton's embrace all over again and smiling against him.

"Love you," he continued when they'd broken apart, both grinning happily , "I've always loved you." Virgil laid his head against Patton's shoulder, breathing out a content sigh. 

"I'm glad, Pat. Me too."

The two of them ended up drifting off to sleep together on the sofa, tangled in each other's arms. For once, Patton wasn't worried about his negative-thinking. Not when he had Virgil there to help him through it. Everything, he discovered, was getting better. Virgil had told him that he loved him, something he'd been too afraid to admit and they'd kissed on the lips! Virgil loved him! He was able to sleep soundly for the rest of the night, curled up against Virgil and dreaming about what their future might hold.

=+=


End file.
